The Inner Landscape

Last Saturday, at Camp

(Written on the shores of Lake Cobbosseecontee)

It’s quarter past 7, and the sun, while setting, shines into Cabin 13. I see its light flicker on the surface of the lake. From the waterfront I hear laughter; the other counselors are taking a swim. An early evening breeze moves the trees; I hear and see them.

When I arrived, I updated paperwork, and the young staff member asked what me what I expected of this week?

Why am I here?

On a certain level, I’m here because someone asked months ago, because there were no other pastors coming this week, because they needed me.

But without knowing it, I agreed to my own salvation, a break from all the roles I play at home, at church and on the web.

The only webs here are woven by spiders, beautiful and intricate, easily broken yet strong enough to be a home and a trap at the same time.  I’ve created my own web of connections and responsibilities. Sometimes I worry whether it will break, whether I will.

Why am I here? I am here to see what God, the Divine, the Creator, would have me see, to be open to grace; to realize, perhaps, that if one web fails I can still spin another, learning from both the loss and the re-creation.

Birds are singing. God help me to understand the song.

17 thoughts on “Last Saturday, at Camp”

  1. Oh what a beautiful web you weave when you write.
    As for the song, you understand – which makes it that much more harder sometimes to hear it.

  2. Sometimes those spider webs are quite strong. I drove my vehicle for 6 weeks with a spider web attached from the passenger side mirror to the door…amazing to say the least. I checked it every day.

  3. hum, a (spiders) web as a metaphor for life…resilient, beautiful, unique, made of the self, able to catch what we need for nourishment…but also sticky, able to be torn, fragile (even as it is strong)…

  4. we do – up to a point – create our own webs don’t we? And allow demands to be put on us – as we take on responsibilities – but I’m glad you had time off 🙂 We all need it.
    That place sounded like God’s oil of healing being poured into you. And I’m glad – so glad. I hope you are able to make God-filled decisions about “what next?” with a less heavy heart.
    Love your writing, and love you!

  5. Adding onething to what mompriest said: when a spiderweb is damaged or destroy, the spider builds an even better web.

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