I made myself a new stole for Advent, out of bulky purple wool. It was spun and dyed here in Maine, and I could feel the lanolin on my hands after touching it. Of all the purple yarns in the store, this one called to me. There was something rough and homespun about it, earthy, perhaps a bit more Lenten than Advent-ian.
The skeins were twisted and tied together at each end. These were skeins that needed unwinding, making straight in order to be made round in a smoothly wound ball. And it seemed that just when I would think I had the flow of the original winding, I would meet a place I could not untangle without the help of another pair of hands.
I felt like that myself yesterday. There were unexpected twists and turns, both in the unfolding of the outer day and in the unwinding of the inner day.
I met my demons, Pain and Fear. Their impish assistants, Ambition, Importance and Success, were close at hand. They bring the message that if only, if only I were a person of note, all would be well.
I don’t actually believe in demons, in the sense of exterior evil spirits sent to tie me into knots. I think we’re fully capable of doing that all by ourselves.
After too much driving, too many meetings, topped off by two (thankfully constructive) hours working on the church budget, I made my way home. There were phone calls to return, children to embrace and settle for the night, a husband who soon went up to bed. But I was still tangled and needed unwinding and smoothing. I sat down to knit and to pray.
Loving God, in this season of Advent, help me to make myself a straight path for you, to make my rough places plain, to catch a glimpse of the view You have for my life. Thank you for the helping hands that work with me to untangle the past and prepare for the work of the future. Amen.