Love is Real

(A sermon for Advent 4C–December 23, 2012–Luke 1:46b-55)

It’s been a pretty grim December. Snow turned to rain, the sky has been gray, lots of foggy days, and that’s just the bad weather news. Early in the month, I went to the 7-11 near my house for gas first thing in the morning and witnessed the arrival of some panhandlers. In Portland, there are organized teams of men and women who stand at busy intersections with signs, taking turns throughout the day. There are more than usual at this time of year. They drove up together. One man filled the gas tank of a car they left parked in the lot. Two went inside to buy coffee. They left the fourth member of their group to stand on the median strip. She was a very young woman, really little more than a girl. She was thin and looked tired, and she was inadequately dressed for the weather. Her sign read, “Out of work with a family to support.” A cigarette drooped on her lip.

I felt the tension between sympathy and suspicion as I drove away. How did she end up at the intersection? How did she end up in that condition?

"The Annunciation" -- Henry Ossawa Tanner, 1898

“The Annunciation” — Henry Ossawa Tanner, 1898

Long ago and far away another young girl faced a crossroads in her life. She received a visit from an angel, and even though I like the sound of angels, the idea of a visit from one is fairly terrifying. After all, they always start by saying, “Fear not!” This angel asked Mary to take on an unbelievable task, a lot more dangerous than standing at an intersection. The angel asked Mary to become the mother of God’s child, to become the mother of part of God’s own self. It’s a mystical notion; we can’t understand it very well. Really, we may not want to think too much about the technicalities.

But in her hometown, within a few months, there would surely be people asking the question, “How did she end up in that condition?”

For Mary it was a matter of faith. She agreed to what the angel announced. “Here I am,” she said, “the servant of the Lord. Let it be with me as you have said.” In the song we read today, she sings praise to God and prophesies that all generations will call her blessed.

She sounds so accepting, but don’t be fooled into thinking she was passive. The words we read this morning are a call to revolution. Mary makes a claim that God has changed the world in the past and by coming into the world will change it again.

And she will be a part of it, nurturing the child who will grow into the man, Jesus. I often say I take comfort in knowing that God understands our challenges and our sorrows, because Jesus lived them. But God also knows the love of a mother because Mary gave it to Jesus. They blessed each other, the mother and the son. God received and gave real, human love, expressed in touch and tears and probably the feeling of being cautioned against bad behavior, and certainly the feeling of being held tight when the troubles are over.

God didn’t just love us from far away; God loved us up close.

And even though that time may seem far away, we can feel and be God’s up close love for one another.

food_donation_photo

Paper products are needed, too!

This church shows love, God’s love, in many ways. Just in the past few days, our church family has staffed the Community Food Pantry in Cumberland, gathered gifts for a family facing challenges here in North Yarmouth, and opened the Pet Pantry to people in need. The stars hanging behind me represent your financial gifts to the Food Pantry. We don’t do these things just because it’s Christmas. Your gifts to the Deacons Fund and your pledges to our church’s Local Mission make it possible for us to show love in practical ways throughout the year. There is nothing mystical about these material expressions of love.

It’s also not a mystical notion that our time together is coming to an end. Pretty much every route I take, every person I see, and every conversation I have has been mentally marked “possibly the last time.” So I have been paying special attention, drinking in the moments to remember later. As I try to say goodbye to each of you, I have to admit that while love never ends, the opportunities to express it are time-sensitive. Time can run out for showing it. Don’t let that happen. Tell the people you love how you feel. Better yet, show them.

And although it’s tempting to think, at Christmas, of the gift you ought to buy, there are other, better ways.

Yes, love is time-sensitive, but love is also outside of time. We still feel love from people who are gone, remembering their kindness to us and the ways they changed our world or changed the world for all people. I remember my grandmother the activist. You remember the teacher who cared about you. This church remembers blessed saints, like Ros and Gladys and Bud. We remember people of faith in the wider world who brought about change of just the kind Mary describes, opening schools to children of all races, bringing peace where there had been war, reminding us ever and always that God is on the side of the lowly and not the powerful. Our actions have the same power: to heal, to console, to encourage, to bless, and to change.

Love varies in its expressions. On Friday morning, fifteen of us gathered here for a time of remembrance. We lit the Advent Wreath; we prayed; we kept silence. Next door our neighbor watched the bell from her kitchen window, telling me later, “I knew more than one person had to be there. Thank you.” If you’ve ever rung the bell here, you know that it takes a good hard pull, and sometimes it rings twice even when you pull only once. Four people went up into the balcony to ring the bell while the rest of us witnessed. We heard the quiet movement of their feet as they shifted to let each other have a turn. Love varies, like their pulling on the bell rope. The way you show it may look or sound different than the way I show it, but it’s still love.

Love is touch. I finally cried over Newtown when I was watching the news Monday night and saw the story about the Comfort Dogs. These trained therapy dogs, part of a Lutheran ministry, traveled from Chicago to Connecticut, and their job was simply to be present in the midst of grief and distress. Petting the dogs makes you feel better, said one little girl. National Geographic.com reports:

One boy confided in the gentle-faced golden retriever about exactly what happened in his classroom at Sandy Hook Elementary School that day—which his parents said was more than he’d been able to share with them. A little girl who hadn’t spoken since the shootings finally started talking to her mother again after petting one of the “comfort dogs.” Groups of teenagers began to open up and discuss their fear and grief with each other as they sat on the floor together, all stroking the same animal.[i]

Surely that is God’s up close love.

Love is real, and real love will turn our world upside down. It will move us where we never thought we would go. It will open us beyond all perceived possibilities. It will strengthen us for whatever comes our way.

God’s up close love changed Mary’s life. It put her in a condition she never expected: mother of God’s own self. She raised him with love, in the best way she knew how, and watched him go out into the world. Mary lived to see her son die, a hard reality no one wants for a mother. We’ve seen too much of it. But we still call her blessed. She opened herself to God and brought forth God’s child out of love.

Out of love, Jesus stood against the proud and for the lowly. He embraced the unacceptable. He stopped at all sorts of crossroads and intersections; he felt no tension between suspicion and sympathy. He talked to people we drive past regularly.

He showed us God’s love is real, up close.

God has done a great thing for us. In all generations, we are blessed. Amen.

 

A Prayer in Dark Times

candleHoly One,

We are struggling to find the right words:

Words of lament and anguish

Words of anger and indignation

Words of compassion and solace.

Lord, in the darkness…

Send us your light.

Creator of all that is,

We give thanks for the good we have seen:

The courage of children and teachers

The bravery of first responders

The gentle words of wise men and women.

Lord, in the darkness…

Send us your light.

Father and mother of us all,

We raise a special prayer for families:

For parents and siblings and grandparents living with unspeakable loss,

For the classmates and schoolmates who saw terrible things,

For the young friends afraid to return to their school.

Lord, in the darkness…

Send us your light.

Jesus, our teacher and friend,

Hear our prayer for those who work in schools:

We thank you for the love you show,

We bless you for your courage,

We grieve with you for your colleagues.

Lord in the darkness…

Send us your light.

Holy Spirit, Heavenly Dove,

Hear our prayer for ourselves:

When we falter in the darkness,

When we lose our way on the path,

When despair overtakes us…

Remind us that there is no darkness so great that the light will not overcome it.

Help us to hold onto that knowledge, even when the light is dim.

Give us patience to watch for the flicker that will become a flame of your power and love, we ask in the name of the coming Christ. Amen.

Discomfort and Joy

(A sermon for Advent 3C — December 16, 2012 — Isaiah 12:2-6; Luke 3:7-18)

Joy. It’s a staccato word, sharp and short. I can remember the sound of it sung by a gym full of school girls, grades 4 through 12, performing a German carol for parents and friends. “How Great the Joy,” we sang, then echoed, “great the joy.” Then louder: “Joy, joy, joy!” And another echo, softer but just as emphatic: “Joy, joy, joy!”

From Principal Dawn Hochsprung's Twitter account.

From Principal Dawn Hochsprung’s Twitter account.

It’s a hard word to hear today. In my mind is a picture put up on Twitter just four days ago by a school principal. Rows of fourth graders are standing dressed for a concert, singing to their friends and their families. Their principal is dead now, along with five other staff members and twenty of the younger schoolchildren. We see their suffering and grief playing out live on television. There is no comfort to be had, only discomfort. How can we be joyful?

Experts will tell us how to care for our children. It’s okay to let them know we are sad, but we shouldn’t show so much emotion that we upset them. They need to count on us, so we need to mask our distress to comfort them. Teach them to follow each worried thought with a brave one.[i] (Easier said than done, I fear, for most of us.)

That’s all psychological advice, and it’s good as far as it goes. But my area is the theological. I want to know where God is in all this. Mr. Rogers, perhaps my favorite Wise Man, drew on his faith when he wrote,

“When I was a boy and I would see scary things in the news, my mother would say to me, “Look for the helpers. You will always find people who are helping.” To this day, especially in times of “disaster,” I remember my mother’s words and I am always comforted by realizing that there are still so many helpers – so many caring people in this world.”[ii]

So when terrible images are on the television, if you can’t spare your children, tell them to look for the helpers. Look for the people who are right there in the middle of danger and sorrow, helping the injured and the suffering. Look for the goodness and love and courage they are sharing. I believe that’s where we find God.

We also need to remember that little ones don’t perceive the world the way we do; they don’t understand permanence. They don’t understand death. We do. We understand death, and illness, and suffering and loss, each of us in our varying ways depending on our life experiences. We understand. And some things we can accept: the losses that come in the normal unfolding of a life. But some things we cannot accept. Some things we cannot understand.

A feeling of helplessness struck everyone who heard the news. We continue to read the minute details of the story – many of which turn out not to be true, by the way – because we’re trying to wrap our heads around it. We’re trying to comprehend how such a thing could happen.

We hear and read opinions that blame whole categories of people from the mentally ill to the autistic to divorced parents, when no one really knows yet what happened. We rush to judgment because that feels less painful than waiting for things to unfold, helplessly. We hear words that I consider blasphemous, such as people who call themselves Christian claiming that God allowed this to happen because we put God out of the schools. That’s an outrageous statement, but no more outrageous than the suggestion that this was part of God’s plan, or that God needed these children as angels in heaven. No. I do not believe this was God’s punishment or plan.

I do not understand how people can think such thoughts.

We wonder, what is wrong with people? What is wrong with this world?

I’m afraid it’s the same things that have been wrong with the world ever since God put people on it. The people of Israel listening to Isaiah were in an enormous mess. They had little hope. Their community had been divided by the invading Babylonians. As we’ve talked about recently, some of them were living under occupation at home while others had been carried off into exile. Families were divided. Who knows what happened to the children along the way, the ones too little to walk a long distance, the ones who cried and disturbed someone, even the ones who were not causing any trouble at all. Who knows?

We wonder, what is wrong with people? What is wrong with this world?

John, in the wilderness, could see the trouble, and he tried to get people right with God. He spoke a hard word. It must have been a bad time for people to be willing to listen to his preaching. He didn’t hesitate to tell the people, and especially the religious leaders, exactly what he thought. He called them cowardly, like vipers that skitter away when their nest is threatened. He called them hypocritical, willing to rest on the reputation of their ancestors. He called them unproductive and unrepentant and unacceptable. A tree that bears no fruit, John tells them, will be cut down.

When they asked him what they should do to please God, he gave them the sort of practical recommendations that we seem almost obvious. Share with those in need; don’t cheat people; don’t abuse your power. It sounds so simple, but we know it’s hard. We struggle to get it right, and when we look around at the world, we see so many people getting it wrong.  We’re living in the short, dark days of the year. We’re living in the hard, sad darkness of tragedy. It’s an act of faith to keep putting one foot in front of the other. It’s an act of faith to believe we are moving toward God’s future, toward the intentions held for us by the One who knows us best of all.

And that is the place where our hope lies, even on the darkest, longest night of the year, or the darkest, longest night of our lives. God doesn’t give up on us. That’s our hope. That well is deep. That hope is eternal. We point to it year in and year out in Advent. We light our candles and remember, but we also light our candles and hope in the future and pray for peace. Today we stand at the well of salvation and try to draw up a little joy. It feels like a long way down as we let out the rope. We sing of joy, but we don’t do it blithely, unknowingly or childishly. We  sing of joy emphatically, to encourage one another.

So hear me:

Even when the things we do and the culture we create and the news we make don’t coincide with love and hope and peace and joy, God does not give up on us. God wants more from us, but God does not give up on us.

So we don’t give up either. No. Here’s what we do:

  • We pray for one another, even for our enemies, even for the ones who commit the destructive acts.
  • We pray especially hard for those who have lost their children, or their mother, or their teacher.
  • We look for the helpers, as Mr. Rogers wisely said, and remember how much goodness there is even at the same time there is so much brokenness.
  • We give any help we can our own selves. We look around us to see where the needs are right here.
  • We come together and sing our joyful praise that there is a God who loves us even in the midst of terrible loss, and we do it on behalf of those who are too sad or too angry or too shocked to do it for themselves.

This is not sweet and easy work. There is nothing sugar-coated about joy. Christian joy is not an emotion, like happiness. Christian joy is a condition of the spirit. It is emphatic, and it is fierce. Isaiah promised the Israelites, far from home and in despair, that a better future was coming. And it came. He promised they would draw water from the well of salvation, and they would do it with joy. And they did. That saving well is deep, and we draw the water from it together. It comes up from a serious, deep-down place. It’s a well of belief in the God who made us and loves us. It’s a well of belief in God-made-man, God who loves us enough to come and dwell among us, with skin on, in Christ Jesus.

It’s a story of joy, but it is not sugar-coated either. “Joy joy joy” we will sing, sharply and resoundingly. “Joy to the World!” We will sing it emphatically! “The Lord is come!” God knew very well what sort of world God’s own self would come into, a world where people treated each other badly and treated children even worse, but God still came. God is still coming. This is the promise of Advent; there is discomfort now, but there will be joy. Amen.


[ii] “Fred Rogers Talks About Tragic Events in the News,” http://fci.org/new-site/par-tragic-events.html

Epiclesis

I first read it in an email,
not at seminary.

What does that mean? I wondered.

A semester of “hymns and worship”
left gaps.

Watching my mentor, my pastors,
stand behind the table,
supplied imperfect knowledge.

I remember they talked about Jesus,
that night with his friends,
the way he broke the bread,
the way he shared the cup,
the way he shocked them.

What was I missing?

Epiclesis:
from the Greek–
the invocation of the Holy Spirit
to consecrate the bread and wine.

Oh!
the prayer of consecration,
that’s the thing.

I fear I only bless them.

God, I say — approximately,
because I don’t use a book –
bless these ordinary things
and make them more than ordinary,
put the extra in them,
change them that we
may know your presence.
Change them that we
may be changed too.

Holy Spirit,
if I am guilty of assuming
or presuming,
not naming you,
not calling on you,
forgive me.

But how else would things be changed?
How else would we?

It Goes By So Fast

I try to keep worship to an hour, even when we have Communion, so I have a side-eye on the clock and move certain things along, but my intention is always to have the time when the congregation comes forward feel time-less. I look each person in the eye as I give the bread, and then they pass to the right or left to dip it in one of the cups being held by a Deacon. But for some reason, today they seemed to barrel toward me, in twos, barely giving me a chance to connect — which is not for me, but feels like an important pastoral act.

It felt like withdrawing.

In three more weeks, we’ll engage in a liturgy of farewell, releasing and forgiving one another. I worked on the order of service this afternoon, and it felt heavy. Saying goodbye well matters.

But it goes by so fast.

It’s the same with mothering. LP and I have pushed up the date of separation as we prepare for my move to Pennsylvania and hers around a few corners to her dad’s house, but it was coming soon anyway, in a matter of months.

As the congregation came up the aisle, so quickly, in such a hurry, I told myself I could not think about how it is the last time.

And then came LP, in the midst of the other choir members, her long hair shining. She looks down at me now, even in flats, wise in some ways beyond her years, and for a fraction of a moment I remembered her sweet little girl face as a seven-year-old, coming up to take Communion from me for the first time, and I felt the pricking of a tear…

and I told myself to stop it. Stop.It.

There will be other times, other times I can say to her, “The Body of Christ, broken for you.” I’ll land somewhere, eventually, and she’ll visit, and there will be Communion, and we will be in it together again.

But it goes by so fast, the days left in this house tumbling toward me like the hurrying communicants, the months until college like a wave racing to break on the shore. We’re both eager for the future — I think I can say that — and anxious about logistics and trying to get a lot of work done in a short time (packing/sorting/disposing for me; college applications for her).

There are many things I will miss, but here’s what surprises me. I grieve a little that the regular intimacy of congregational life will not likely be ours again.

Does that sound like an odd thing to say? We’ve been making the journey to church together every Sunday, just about, for her whole life. When I became a pastor ten years ago, she became a part of the ministry team. I value her reflections on human interactions in the congregation, and her critiques of my sermons and messages for the children. I value her company, the ways in which she accompanies me.

This day was coming, anyway. But I never expected my empty nest to be the Communion table.

Signs of Hope

(A sermon for Advent 1C–December 2, 2012–Jeremiah 33:14-16; Luke 21:25-36)

starbucks-eggnog-latte1

An eggnog latte in the red cup.

Yesterday I turned the calendar over to December. We’ve survived Black Friday and Small Business Saturday and Cyber Monday. I have stopped shaking my head when the Starbucks barista hands me the red cup. Those blow-up Christmas decorations are to be found in people’s yards again: Snowmen and Snow Globes and even Abominable Snow Monsters. These are signs of our 21st Century American Christmas.

Things are in chaos at our house as we prepare to move. Lucy and I have made a tough, but smart, decision not to have a tree this year. But later today, we will arrange my grandmother’s nativity set on the mantle, finding a safe place to tuck Baby Jesus away until Christmas Eve. It is the sign to us that no matter how many other things we need to do in the next few weeks, how many boxes we need to pack or bags of old clothes need to make their way to Goodwill, Christmas is truly coming.

Here in church we also have practices that are familiar to the season. Advent is the season that asks us to hold back our Christmas celebration for a few more weeks, to prepare for the incarnation, the in-breaking of the divine into human life. We are preparing for more than a gift exchange. In our church and in our families, we’re preparing to celebrate what it means to us to be part of Christ’s family.

First AdventIf the Advent wreath is being lit, Christmas is only a few weeks away. If we are hearing the words of prophets who spoke of a savior, then the gospel stories of Jesus’ birth will soon follow.

Today we hear from Jeremiah. He spoke to a community in turmoil, literally divided by the invading Babylonians. As if in slow motion, the attackers split the community, forcing a large portion of the population to captivity in Babylon at the same time they occupied Jerusalem. Those who stayed behind lived under foreign rule in their own land. They saw the Temple destroyed. The exiles struggled to worship God faithfully while living far from their holy place.

They wondered why God let this happen to them.

They listened to Jeremiah, because God spoke through him. But the words of Jeremiah were not comforting. He almost seemed to enjoy pointing out the things his people had done wrong, the ways they had separated themselves from God.

But after many chapters of hard words, Jeremiah offered the people a promise:

33:14 The days are surely coming, says the LORD, when I will fulfill the promise I made to the house of Israel and the house of Judah.

33:15 In those days and at that time I will cause a righteous Branch to spring up for David; and he shall execute justice and righteousness in the land.

33:16 In those days Judah will be saved and Jerusalem will live in safety. And this is the name by which it will be called: “The LORD is our righteousness.”

Jeremiah shared God’s promise of a savior, a “righteous Branch” to spring up for all the house of David. Jeremiah’s words were a sign that there was still something to hope for, that all was not lost. Someday, somehow, there would be help. There would be justice. There would be righteousness. There would be safety. The Righteous Branch would bring protection.

manger 1The Christmas stories in Luke and Matthew tell us of signs in the sky. The angels the shepherds saw, the star the magi followed, did not bring them to an armed camp or a palace but to a manger, to a baby wrapped in whatever his mother could find to keep him warm. This was the Righteous Branch? Our hope is in the helplessness of a baby who grew up to be a wandering storyteller.

Maybe we can see why the people wanted a captain or a King instead. Where was Jeremiah’s winner? The faithful expected a Righteous Warrior prepared to swing his branch like a sword and defeat the foes. His victory over earthly powers would prove their God was the real one. His strength would put the oppressors in their place. His justice would be swift and righteous and sweet.

The itinerant preacher painted pictures of the future that were considerably less comforting. We come to these texts in Advent, too, and they feel out of tune with the season of insistent jollity. We are getting ready for the baby in the manger, or the presents under the tree, and here comes Jesus predicting the end of the world. It’s a scary scenario, isn’t it? He speaks of signs in the sun and the moon and the stars, great storms, and fear and foreboding all around us.

Mayan-CalendarHis speech doesn’t have the same special effects as the movie “2012,” with its visuals of Los Angeles falling into the ocean. (You’re not really expecting the end of the world when the Mayan calendar runs out on December 21st, are you?) But he points to the kinds of natural events and collective anxieties that people around him knew well. An eclipse of the sun or the moon created fear. An unusually powerful storm made people wonder if things would ever be normal again. War, disease, drought all counted as signs of God’s disfavor.

‘Tis the Season of the End of the World.

Or maybe just the end of the world as we know it.

I’m going away, he is saying, but I am coming back again. For the people listening, his going away would have seemed like the end of the world, surely, and his return, even in a cloud of glory, was not exactly a source of comfort and joy.

Perhaps the itinerant storyteller is reading his audience when he shifts gears. He gives them the big picture, but then he brings it back to his more accustomed mode of teaching, the parable. Maybe he can see they need a way back to the ordinary world. Even in the everyday things we see, there are signs of what is to come. The fig tree was one of the last to get its leaves each spring, and Jesus reminds us that some signs point us to what ought to be obvious, even when it isn’t! The fig leaves point to summer. You know what it looks like.

Change is coming, sisters and brothers, says Jesus. It won’t always be the way it is now. I’ll be arrested and things will look terrible, but just for a little while. Keep watching, I will be with you.

Change is coming, people of Israel, says Jeremiah. You won’t always be in exile, and the Babylonians will go home, and it will get better. Hold on, God is with you.

Change is coming, people of North Yarmouth Congregational Church. Listen up! Pay attention! Christmas is almost here.

What are we hoping for? We have seen signs: visions of Powerball winnings and credit card bills and trips to the Apple Store for an iPad Mini dance in our heads. But these are the signs of our 21st Century American Christmas. They weigh us down with the expectations of society, the demands for gifts and cards and attendance at parties.

eggnog punchbowlWhat do we really hope for this Christmas, down underneath the wrapping paper and the gift cards and the eggnog lattes…and maybe the eggnog, too? We’re probably not focused too hard on end-of-the-world hopes, visions of being snatched to heavenly safety when everything implodes.

No, it’s more likely we’re focused on what’s right in front of us. We may hope for renewed health, or peace of mind. We may hope someone will see what’s best for him, or how much we really love her. We may hope God will point us – clearly – in the direction we are meant to go.

Those are individual hopes, but they are hopes for the world, too.

We hope God will point the world in a better direction.

But God did, already. We’re just taking our own sweet time reading the signs, as Jesus said we would. We fail to notice them because we get caught up in the things of this world.

christmas-star

So let’s try, for the little while of Advent, to see them.

Be alert for the signs:

  • Doors opening to families with nowhere to spend the night;
  • And shining lights that guide us in the darkness;
  • And Good News shared by angels in ordinary clothing.

This Advent, look for the One who came, and is coming, to change the world.

Farewell Newsletter Article

nycc blog header

Dear ones in Christ,

The earliest document preserved in the New Testament is 1 Thessalonians, a letter written by Paul in 51 C.E. to the church at Thessalonika. It is our first impression of what the newly born Christian faith and practice might have been like, decades before the gospels were written.  In this letter, Paul writes to a beloved community, saying:  How can we thank God enough for you in return for all the joy that we feel before our God because of you? (1 Thessalonians 3:9)

Paul wondered whether he would ever see the people at Thessalonika again, and he cared deeply about their faith. Soon I will be far away, and although I will not see you, this family of faith will always hold a place in my heart. We have shared in both personal trials and celebrations in the past several years. You have shown a deep kindness to me and to my dear ones, the two-legged and the four-legged.

Saying goodbye is never easy. My last service of worship will be at 11 p.m. on Christmas Eve. There we will gather around Christ’s table, as Christians have done since before Paul wrote his letter to the Thessalonians. For almost 2000 years, faithful people have been parting from one another with words of Christ’s peace, and we will do the same. At my last Sunday service, on December 23, we will take the time to say good-byes and to release each other from our covenant in ministry. You will always have a place in my heart, but after I leave here for the last time on December 26, I will not be able to baptize or officiate at funerals or weddings for members of this church; that is the practice in our faith tradition.

We read this passage from Thessalonians in Advent, the beginning of the church year, a time when we anticipate the unpredictable future. Paul writes, And may the Lord make you increase and abound in love for one another and for all, just as we abound in love for you. (1 Thessalonians 3:12)  Like Paul, I wonder how things will develop for the people I can no longer see. I have hopes for your future together. I pray that God will be with you in all that you do and that you will share your abounding love with the hungry and hurting in this community and in the world. I pray that you will be spiritually nourished by your work on Christ’s behalf.

Your next chapter will unfold without me, as mine will without you. Whatever comes next, know that you do not face it alone, for the God who made you and the Christ who redeemed you and the Holy Spirit who comforts you will always be with you. As God has blessed you, may you be a blessing to others.

Faithfully,

Rev. Martha

What Are We Waiting For?

We do a lot of waiting at this time of year: in traffic, in lines to pay for purchases, at the Post Office mailing packages, to hear whether we will plunge off the fiscal cliff. We wait with anxiety, wondering how things can possibly come out right.

We also possibly spend a lot of time waiting to be faked out. After several months of watching the news avidly, I’ve mostly turned it off. I know what’s going to happen. No Republican will want to be the one who drove the family car of the United States over the fiscal cliff. No Democrat will want to be remembered that way either. They will reach an agreement, I predict, and it will be ugly and ungracious. I refuse to let them drive me off the anxiety cliff in the process, in service of a conspiracy — one I hope is unplanned, but who knows? — a conspiracy to keep us turning on the TV and buying the newspaper. What next? What next?

More of the same, I fear.

I grew up in a political family, wearing my father’s campaign buttons. (You can read more about him on Wikipedia.) Here’s a thing he understood and passed along to me: people have to work together to accomplish anything good for anyone. They may not agree on the specifics, but somewhere in the magnificent middle, they can figure out what’s best and what will work. When he had a problem with someone, he didn’t go on the news and say that person was a liar or a cheat or an idiot. He looked for another way around the disagreement.

In recent years, we’ve seen absolute brutality in national politics, with people publicly imputing the worst possible motives to their opponents. It’s a direct ticket to the edge of every kind of cliff, where a crowd gathers, waiting to see who will be pushed off first.

It’s as if we can no longer afford to give “the other side” the benefit of the doubt.

We’re seeing this in the hearings about Benghazi. One side assumes the worst about the other, and everyone is happy to go on TV and say so.

So what happens when we’ve been listening to discussions of inhumane tone, and then we need to have a conversation at church? I’ve watched it happen in churches I serve. In the United Church of Christ, my denomination, we have a designation for churches who declare their welcome to LGBT people. To become Open and Affirming, a church needs to have a study process first. I’ve seen it happen that a church can’t get to the process because the loudest voice “wins” by shutting down a conversation about talking about becoming Open and Affirming. Yes, I built in the apparent redundancy on purpose. The loudest voice shut down the possibility of talking about talking about doing the process.

We don’t know how to disagree without getting into a fight, because that’s all we see portrayed before us. We shut down to avoid the conflict. We tell ourselves there will be a better time later, sometime in the future.

What are we waiting for?

How long, O Lord, how long?

I want to tell you I’ve been willing to show courage and take on tough issues, but I’m not good at it. I get wound up. My heart beats uncomfortably hard and fast. It’s one thing to disagree where there is trust and love. It’s another thing to do it in the face of hostility. How sad is it that the place I’m afraid to face disagreement is the church, a place where we expect to have love and trust?

We end up waiting things out, clinging to the edges of community where the like-minded people also situate themselves. It’s true for most of us, at either end of the spectrum.

Somewhere in the middle is a place, maybe, where that same most of us, maybe, can muddle through the differences of belief and understanding together. I don’t mean doing it the way the politicians will to avoid the famous cliff; I’m not speaking of expediency followed by diatribes. Making our way to that muddled middle requires tuning out the extreme voices, the ones spewing anger as a weapon. In politics, turn them off. Don’t vote for them. Easy enough. On the internet, on your blog, on mine, ignore the comments.

But in church it’s harder. The same voice that was loudest, closing off discussion, may be the voice of the person who needs you to visit a dying mother in the hospital. The same voice that was loudest, raising the blood pressure of everyone else in the room, may be the voice of the person who works all day to cook a meal for the hungry. That same voice that was the loudest, making you wonder if you might lose your job if the conversation didn’t stop right there, may be the voice of the person saying “Thanks be to God” when you offer the bread and the cup.

You can’t change that channel.

You can only change yourself.

(Yes, that means me, too.)

I’ve been waiting for it to be easy, but I can’t wait anymore. In the muddled middle, I’m trying to practice saying what I believe matter-of-factly, kindly and openly. I’m trying not to be apologetic or aggressive. I’m trying not to wait anymore and speak the words God is calling out of me, the words God is calling me to say.

I’m trying to trust God in the middle of it.

What are you waiting for?

(Cross-posted at Political Theology.)

Wonder

I’ve been quiet this Advent.

Last year I blogged every day, purposefully, because blogging had been such a big part of my life for so many years, and I think I wanted to prove to myself that even though many changes were occurring, I was still the same person.

But I’m not the same person, exactly, or rather not the person I thought I was.

Which is okay. It’s really quite wonder-filled, the recognition that the stories I’ve been telling myself about myself may not have been all there was to know. I’ve been evaluating, for instance, my attachment to being the person my mother wanted me to be, and how that fierce clinging shut out possibilities for self-expression, for relationship, even for joy.

And it’s not that I would want to go back and live it all over again differently, but I am grateful for seeing things from a different perspective. I’m glad to know myself a little better, a process I expect will go on for the rest of my life. I’ve been quiet this year because I haven’t had to work so hard to find the wonder or the joy or the love of Advent. I haven’t had to remind myself they exist, somewhere.

Last year, I pushed myself through Advent and Christmas, busy in my new ministry, determined to “make” it a good Christmas for my children to make up for the way our lives had been disrupted by disappointment and grief. I strove to find some sense of Christmas for myself, some sliver of hope or joy to carry me through the great expenditure of energy required for a pastor at this time of year. I wrote over and over again last December about how the love my friends showed in a time of difficulty was helping me hold it together, and that was true. But the person who made it Christmas for me was my son, Peter, who took me to hear the Boston Pops Christmas concert. The blurry pictures we took that day contain the feeling of wonder awoken in me again and carried home that night, by bus, in a snowstorm. Even in the darkest time, there was some light.

I was amazed.

The rest of Christmas was easy. I’m thankful for the gift Peter gave me, for its origin in his thoughtfulness and his knowledge of my childhood dreams. I hope I’m doing the same for them, listening to their inclinations rather than imposing my own, encouraging their wholeness rather than imploring them to fit into particular roles.

What I’ve discovered in the past year is that I can do the same for myself. I can listen to my inclinations and encourage my own wholeness, rather than forcing myself to bend into a shape that is not mine. And that is a wonder, indeed.

All the Generations

(A reflection for Advent 4B–December 18, 2011–Psalm 89:1-4; Matthew 1:1-24)

In Bible Study this fall, we’ve been reading the first two books of the Old Testament, and they are chock-a-block with genealogies. I sometimes offer to read them myself, the way I read the names this morning, but the truth is I don’t know how to pronounce some of them, and the pronunciation I give them owes more to my Southern upbringing than to my seminary education.

The question has been asked, more than once, why write it all down? It doesn’t even always line up accurately.

But the answer is that somewhere along the way, when life was challenging and memories of the past seemed at risk, people decide it was important to gather up all the stories and all the lists of names and put them safely together in one document, to record God’s relationship with all the generations. These lists of fathers and sons, mostly, with some side trips to mention mothers and wives, provide the background for the dramatic stories of battles and murders and miracles and prophets and ancient nomads and angelic visitors and dysfunctional families.

Yes, we’ve had those since the very beginning.

The New Testament, the Good News of Jesus Christ, begins with a family tree.  It describes the trunk of Abraham and the branch of David and the generations leading to the new leaf we celebrate every year at Christmas, the birth of God into human form.

It’s a *family* tree, a reminder that God did not simply manifest as a full-grown person with no connections. No. God connected, to all the generations. And God ultimately connected to the human experience by becoming one of us, with parents and grandparents and cousins and aunts and uncles. God connected to us through all time and in all places by being born.

I will sing of your steadfast love, O LORD, forever; with my mouth I will proclaim your faithfulness to all generations. (Psalm 89:1, New Revised Standard Version)

This long family tree, describing these many generations, brings us to Joseph, the human father who would raise Jesus. He came from a long line of the faithful. They praised God’s steadfast love in happy times, but in complicated times as well: in war, in grief, in slavery, in famine and in exile. They proclaimed God’s faithfulness to all generations. They believed that what they hoped ford would come, if not in their time, then surely in the time to come.

Joseph was the one who would see hope come alive.

Just like Mary, though, he had to make a decision. Would he listen to the angel and believe the story he was told?

We don’t usually read the family tree. We wonder why it’s even there. It’s there to tell us why Joseph said his yes to God.

So all the generations from Abraham to David are fourteen generations; and from David to the deportation to Babylon, fourteen generations; and from the deportation to Babylon to the Messiah, fourteen generations. (Matthew 1:17, NRSV)

Julia Margaret Cameron

In all the generations, Joseph’s family believed in God’s unfailing love. They passed down to him a trust in God’s love that enabled him to respond faithfully.

2000 years later, we’re trying to do the same thing, to tell the world about our experience of God’s love and to pass it along to the next generation. Later today our children will act out the story Matthew gives us in a few compact verses. We want them to know it because someday one of them may be called on to do something remarkable, just like Joseph. Out of love for us, God came into the world as a baby. Let us tell the world about God’s faithfulness, to all the generations.

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